The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
do herpes really smell.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
