508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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