I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
