is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
