She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
