You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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