I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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