What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
