I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Randomize
