if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
