take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize