i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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