you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
