your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
