Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Randomize
