Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish my penis had a tongue
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize