i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
