Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize
