TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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