AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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