so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
