Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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