my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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