this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
