I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
