Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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