I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
