im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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