I feel great
I just peed on a car
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize
