I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
