if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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