I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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