Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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