That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize