your parents love me but you hate me
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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