you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
