white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
