this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Randomize