Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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