i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
