Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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