Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

I pooped in a mop bucket.

(1-512): View more from Texas

WTF???

(512): View more from Texas

Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that

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(607): View more from New York

people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.

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(858): View more from California

Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere

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(661): View more from California

i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me

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(973): View more from New Jersey

My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"

(973): View more from New Jersey

That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.

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(817): View more from Texas

2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.

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(303): View more from Colorado

anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?

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(304): View more from West Virginia

when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.

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