I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
