she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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