Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize