Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
