new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
