You really coming over, don't trick.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
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hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
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There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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