Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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