I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
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This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
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What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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