i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
