You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
